Monday, February 8, 2010

Rain God


Before you start laughing let me just say it for you: I don't know a thing about rhymes. So you can all stop the snickers and pay attention now.

I found out from Marla's blog that someone is doing a challenge with a twist. The gist of it is for readers to list or write simple things that make them happy, and for each response the author of Enchanted Oak will donate 2 dollars to Haiti's medical clinic.

Great idea! I thought.

I further thought: a good cause is worth a following act. So here it is: for each word at the end of each line below that you can think of a better substitute, I will donate 5 dollars to Red Cross to help Haiti. There are 40 lines, and each word can only be changed once. The cap is there because, um, Ms. Sarah is currently jobless, so she needs to exercise a little self control. The changed ones will be in blue font.

You can help Haiti's crisis and my rhymes, so what are you waiting for?


* * *

leaves on trees shimmer with thousands of sequins
freshly cleansed air smells of grass and aspens
thank heavens for the blessing of showers
to god of rain I pleaded with a whisper

please grace us with more nourishing moisture
water is in such desperate need at this juncture
several counties are talking the dreaded "R" word
we do not want a drought again just too absurd

* * *

the god of rain indulges me freely
two weeks of rain has fallen easily
grass on the mountains flaunt its new color
I can not find a shade bears more splendor

but the warmth of sun fairy is long missing
could you please let up just a smidgen
our water level is now more than bountiful
a little breather in between will make us o so thankful

* * *

my dog is bored and demand action
my bones are complaining dissatisfaction
my house the haven for fungi and pesters
my yard a jungle of moss that festers

one trip on the slippery brick road back there
could send me flying to the doctors in despair
the heartless god of rain parades on
there is no sign of stopping his fun

* * *

houses on the cliff are falling off to sea
saturated lands slide away everyday on tv
cars swirl and pile up everywhere you see
all state's freeways are too watery for me

wet air now smells like old woman's dirty shawl
musty, damp and suffocating on my skull
why can't you stop the cursed downpour
your mischief is more than our simple wish

* * *

one more week of rain announced by the forecaster
you should be ashamed of your ungodly behavior
when I pleaded with you for more moisture
I did not say, mind you, please rain forever

now that you have ruined houses, cars and lives
do pack up your hose, drums and darkened skies
may I suggest to sahara desert that you stay
I'm sure no one will b*tch there as you play



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25 comments:

  1. im sorry sarah
    but i have a date with cara, and have no time to think of a rhyme,
    but i hope you stay dry and never forget, that tomorow the sun may shine :D

    regarding that other lady. her rule is that I have to write something that makes me happy, well you know me maam, I never am happy sitting in my pit of dispair.
    so do you think it would count if I went over to her place and wrote a long whinning, complaining, self loathing, suicadally depressing reply, but at the end close it with,, "but it makes me happy when people give $2 to help those in need."

    will that count? :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. zuzanna - thanks, but no corrections?

    john - we're a little late to challenge the other lady, as her contest ended handsomely, so stop whining and forget about cara, let's get this one going in a jiffy! (stay safe and warm john)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Tricky. I'm thinking - where do we post them, here? Or on our own blog?

    ReplyDelete
  4. uber - please post it here so i can update the verses as we go. thanks and can't wait!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sorry Sarah, but I really really suck dreadfully in writing poems and especially at finding rhymes.

    I thought yours were good!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. aaaw sarah - at least give it a shot. i thought 'asked for' could be changed to a better word, but couldn't think of any!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Your mischief is more than our simple wish?

    Well done Sarah and good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  8. tina - okay i'm changing it. thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Lovely! Now you need to write one to the Snow God. Specifically, to make him leave my neighborhood!

    ReplyDelete
  10. melissa - there's an idea! but while i think about it, first you have to change a word at the end of a sentence.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I enjoy the rhymes but I cannot find any substitues...Still my English is not rich enough... lovely idea, to contribute to Haiti being so creative

    LOL

    ReplyDelete
  12. now that you have ruined houses, cars and lives
    do pack up your hose, drums and darkend skies
    may I suggest to sahara desert that you stay
    I'm sure no one will b*tch there as you play
    BIG HUGS

    ReplyDelete
  13. bob - thank you! $190 to go...

    lorenza - my english isn't any better than yours. this is just for fun. want to give it a try?

    ReplyDelete
  14. Sarah ~ What an awesome idea!! Ok, here goes....


    my house the haven for fungi and pesters
    my yard a jungle of moss that festers

    ReplyDelete
  15. I'm not sure if this sounds right:

    several counties are talking the dreaded "R" word
    we do not want a drought again just too absurd

    ReplyDelete
  16. kim - that's a good one. thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  17. I love the idea but can't think of a rhyme :(

    ReplyDelete
  18. kate - thanks for stopping by.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Your poem was tempting,
    So I tried but came up empty.

    Apparently, my Saturday brain is lame. Send to Haiti anyway. :)

    ReplyDelete
  20. fl - lol! i will count that one as a $5.00 rhyme and add to it. thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  21. my dog is bored and demanding action

    my bones are complaining dissatisfaction

    ReplyDelete
  22. OK I'm playing!
    all state's freeways are too watery to steer


    all state's freeways are too watery for me....

    Great idea!

    ReplyDelete
  23. charlene, sandra - great job! thanks for playing!!

    ReplyDelete

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